


A Good Time

by PapiPascal



Series: Whiskey and Cigarettes [1]
Category: Kingsman (Movies), Narcos (TV)
Genre: Blowjobs, Creampie, Do you have a minute to talk about our lord and savior Pedro Pascal?, F/M, I blame the Pascalitos chat, M/M, One Shot, Pascalitos, Pedro Pascal - Freeform, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Restraints, Smut, Threesome, Unprotected Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-14 15:48:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29544711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PapiPascal/pseuds/PapiPascal
Summary: You go to a bar to relieve some stress when you happen across two men that both seem to hate each other butreallyseem to like you.
Relationships: Agent Whiskey/Reader, Jack Daniels/reader, Javier Peña/Agent Whiskey, Javier Peña/Jack Daniels, Javier Peña/Reader
Series: Whiskey and Cigarettes [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2170863
Comments: 6
Kudos: 79





	A Good Time

**Author's Note:**

> This absolute shameless filth is 100% dedicated to the Pascalitos Spicy Pedro NSFW chat on Discord. Ask and you shall receive. A lil bit of humor and whole lotta porn.
> 
> Not the title of this fic coming from me asking the chat what I should call a Javi/Whiskey/Insert reader fic and someone literally saying "I would call that a good time"...

You relaxed on the bar stool, allowing your shoulders to slump and your posture to ease as the bartender sat your drink down in front of you. You knew by color, price, and experience that the drink was watered down, having barely any alcohol in it, but you didn't mind. It had been a long day at work, and despite being an overpriced hole-in-the-wall, it was the closest bar to your apartment. It was never too crowded, and you never had any issues there other than the occasional mumbled complaint about charging too much for mixed drinks that had entirely too much juice. The bar, Burn's Alley, was your favorite spot in town to unwind after a rough work week. Most of the the patrons were regulars that gave you a nod of acknowledgement, but otherwise left you to your devices once they realized you didn't hit the spot for social interaction. You could throw back enough watered down vodka crans to help you relax and then you were generally on your way before the bartender's workload slowed enough to ask you how your week had been.

That night was different. You knew it was going to be the moment your eyes scanned Burn's Alley and landed on someone entirely out of place for a dive bar that specialized in classic rock and nicotine stained pool tables. You were used to seeing worn leathern leather jackets and hearing the rumble of motorcycles, not cowboy boots, cowboy hats, and loud complaining about how the jukebox didn't have Willie Nelson songs. You rolled your eyes and returned to your drink. The man was fully aware that he was being loud and obnoxious, and didn't seem to care. His voice was a thick, southern drawl that was out of place, and it was only a matter of time before someone hurled an insult his way. The Burn's Alley regulars didn't mind newcomers, but they weren't exactly fans of people begging for attention either.

The thick smell of smoke filled your nose as someone next to you lit up a cigarette and you reflexively looked over at the scent. You had never seen this guy before either, but at least he seemed to be a better fit. Being privately owned, the Burn's Alley owner allowed smoking as long as people didn't smoke the whole place out and made sure to stub out their cigarettes. The well loved leather of the man's leather jacket creaked as he flicked some ash into the ashtray sitting on the bar counter. "That guys just asking for it." He muttered quietly, taking another long drag and making eye contact with you as you looked over.

"Yeah." You sighed, deciding that for once you'd at least be cordial to a newcomer speaking to you. "This doesn't exactly seem like his scene. He must be new around here."

The man's lips curled into a smirk as he shifted on his seat, angling his body towards you. "That would make two of us, then."

You snorted a little, simply because small talk wasn't your area of expertise. At least he wasn't being creepy, it was a conversation you could engage in. "Well, you don't sound like an absolute hick, so I'm guessing he's a lot further from home than you are."

Laughing, the man took another drag from his cigarette. "You'd be surprised. I just got back from calling Columbia my home for a couple of years." He raised his glass, looking at the amber liquid with a slight pout. "I'm glad to be stateside again, but the liquor is cheaper there."

After taking a sip of your own drink, you replied. "I've complained to the owner a million and two times. It doesn't do any good. You're not just paying for the liquor. You're paying for the experience, according to him." Taking another sip and realizing it was mostly watered down ice, you begrudgingly accepted that you were going to have to order another one.

"Yeah, and what experience is that?" He asked, gesturing towards the other guy still arguing with the jukebox like it had personally offended him. "Seeing some fucking hillbilly try to fight a jukebox because it doesn't have his shit taste in music?"

You laughed as you glanced over at the man now physically shaking the jukebox with his bar hands as if that would somehow change the music selection. "Nah, this is the only place in town on a Friday night that's going to have a seat available for you to sit down. You should be grateful."

Grinning, the man stubbed his cigarette out in the ashtray. "In company like yours? Of course I'm grateful." He extended his hand for you to shake it, and you took it. "Javier Peña. Let me buy you a drink."

You introduced yourself and agreed; how could you say no? He was charming. His voice was deep and husky, his smile inviting and flirty. Since he wasn't a local, you figured maybe you could blow off steam in a way other than alcohol and not have to deal with him again.

Small talk quickly progressed to you learning that he was a DEA agent that had just wrapped up a case involving the Columbian drug cartel. You weren't entirely sure if he was just open and honest, or if the admission was supposed to impress you, but it kept you from having to talk about yourself more than you wanted, so you could get behind listening to some of the wild stories he started telling you. He would smile when he made you laugh, and lick his lips when he was listening as you spoke, and you couldn't help but lean a little closer with every minute that passed.

Javier was cut off mid sentence when his phone sitting on the bar started vibrating. He quickly flipped it over, reading the name of the caller and his face fell a little. "It's work, I gotta grab this." He glanced back up at you, smiling a little. "Don't go anywhere until I get back." With a quick wink he answered the call and stood up, making his way to the exit so he could talk outside where it was a little quieter.

You were on your third drink, halfway done and _finally_ starting to feel the pleasant warmth and buzz from the alcohol. By no means did Javier need to get you drunk to even try to sleep with you, but it was taking the edge off of a hectic work week and was much needed. The best part is that you were 100% sure that Javier wasn't even _trying_ to get you drunk. Despite you catching him raking his eyes over you more than once, he was being perfectly respectable and something about it drove you up the wall because something about him told you that he was the exact opposite behind closed bedroom doors... or seedy bar bathroom doors at this rate if he kept laying on the charm.

Your thoughts were interrupted as the barstool next to you was suddenly occupied smoothly, causing you to look over. "Well hellooo there darlin'. What's a pretty thing like you doing in a place like this?"

You cocked an unamused eyebrow at the man with the jukebox vendetta from earlier. You gestured to your drink and smugly replied with "Drinking. Same thing you're here for. And based on your falling out with the jukebox earlier, I think you've already had a few too many, cowboy."

The man laughed and grinned, his eyes trailing over your body slowly. "Oh, that? I just expected this joint to have better music, that's all." His voice was so unlike Javier's. While Javier's was deeper, all gravel and smoke, this man's was as thick and sweet as honey, dripping in southern dialect. "What do you say you let me buy you a drink to make up for my terrible first impression?"

Before you can reply, Javier slid into the seat on the other side of you, his eyebrows furrowed at the other man in distaste. "She's already got a drink, Clint Eastwood."

The other man drummed his fingers on the bar top impatiently, before reaching over and grabbing your drink, holding the glass to the light for a moment before tossing the remains of it over his shoulder and on the floor. "And now she doesn't. What kind of man buys a lady a drink and doesn't even make sure they use top shelf liquor?" He flagged the highly unamused bartender down and pointed to the top shelf vodka before sitting the glass back down in front of you and asking the bartender for a better drink.

You look down at the remains of your ice and drink on the floor and start to say "You know, someone could slip-" before Javier interrupts you.

"What kind of man throws himself at a woman that's clearly not interested and wants you to back off?"

"Now if she wanted me to back off, I would, boy. That's just good manners. Manners maketh-"

"Who in the _fuck_ says 'maketh'?" Javier challenged.

The man shoots Javier a dirty look before bringing his attention back to you. "I'm so sorry for the company you keep, sugar. I'm Agent Whiskey, but a pretty thing like you? You can call me by my real name, Jack Daniels. Hell, you can call me whatever you want to, darlin', but choose quick because you'll be screaming it all night-"

Javier laughed. "You _really_ think you have a shot with her, don't you? Looking like you just walked off of farm? Jesus, first Murphy and now this, why am I always surrounded by fucking hillbillies-"

"You think you fair much better, pretty boy? Looking like a 70's pornstar reject-"

"Alright, that's _enough_." You finally say after quickly downing your entire glass because you're tired of them bickering. "You do both realize I'm sitting _right here_ , right? And that I can hear both of you?"  
  
"You know, she's right." Javier replied to Whiskey after giving you a quick, apologetic look. "Sorry, baby. Now what were we talking about before work called? Oh that's right, so we were tailing Escobar-" You could hear Whiskey snort before taking a gulp of his own drink, and you quickly realized their little competition wasn't over yet. "Oh, I'm sorry." Javier snapped at Whiskey sarcastically. "Is my job boring you? What do you do for a living, ride a fucking horse?"  
  
"I was working on global cases while you were slumming it going after Escobar. I know who you are, Agent Peña, I watch the news. I have a respect for your job of ending the war on drugs, but you might want to step your game up while trying to impress a woman." He leaned closer to you. "Now if you want to hear a real story, you should ask Javier here how much American money was used on purchasing prostitutes by the DEA in Columbia because they obviously can't get laid without throwing some change. Or how many people senselessly died in the process of trying to bring Escobar-"  
  
Javier was standing, his gun already drawn and pointed at Whiskey, causing you to almost topple out of your seat with the need to get out of the way even though the gun wasn't pointed at you. "Shut the fuck up." Javier growled. "You think I don't know who the Statesmen are? How many people have _you_ killed?"  
  
Whiskey just chuckled, standing up and stretching a little, as he reached for a lasso attached to his hip, paying Javier's gun no mind. "I'm gonna have to teach you some manners, huh boy?"  
  
"With a fucking lasso?" Javier spat.  
  
"Okay, I'm done here." You finally said, standing up. "You two are clearly more interested in your own pissing contest than me anyway. So you two have a good night." You started heading for the door, but Javier grabbed your arm. Not too tight for it to hurt, but just on the right side of firmly that stopped you in your tracks. He lowered his gun after glaring at Whiskey one last time.  
  
"Fuck this asshole. How about we go back to your place?" He dropped his grip, a smirk reappearing on his lips as he looked at you through his lashes slightly, once again laying on the flirting thick.  
  
"Or..." Whiskey said, taking his hand off his lasso now that there wasn't a gun in his face. "She could come back to _my_ place because I have a penthouse in almost every major city from here to Tallahassee."  
  
They both looked over at you expectantly, waiting for you to choose, but if they wanted to play games, you could play games. "My place. Both of you."  
  
Javier quirked an eyebrow at you. "...both of us?"  
  
"That's right. Both of you." You repeated. You were mostly joking, but there was a part of you that hoped that the offer rang true. Javier and Whiskey were total opposites, but both were attractive and cocky, and you had a sneaky suspicious that their both their cockiness was well earned. Either way you would win, because either you could go home and leave them here at the bar to continue at each others throats, or they could _both_ go home with you and you could have the night of your life.  
  
"Afraid of a little threesome?" Whiskey challenged.  
  
"Yeah, well, the threesomes I've been in haven't been with another guy." Javier mumbled back.  
  
"That's my offer." You said, crossing your arms. "I live less than a five minute walk from here. You have two minutes to make up your minds."  
  
"I'll do it." They both said immediately and simultaneously.  
  
You grinned. This was going to be fun.  
  
  
  
The moment your apartment door was shut behind the three of you, both their hands were on you. Javier was in front of you, and he curled his hands around the back of your neck to pull you in for a kiss while Whiskey came up behind you and gently swept your hair away from your neck to plant kissed along side it, nipping at the skin and slapping your ass through the fabric of your thin dress. You moaned against Javier's lips at the feeling of them both pressed against you, the feeling of both their lips covering you in desperate kisses. "Bedroom." You muttered desperately as Javier broke the kiss of your lips to trail kisses down your throat towards your chest. You didn't have to tell them twice as you gestured towards the door on the left down the hallway. Javier made his way to the door as Whiskey swept you up in his arms and tossed you over his shoulder, chuckling at how it caused you to yelp. As soon as you were all in the bedroom, Javier reached for the hem of your dress, slowly dropping to his knees as he pushed the fabric up and into Whiskey's hands for him to pull the dress off over the top of your head. Javier put his hands between your thighs and forced them apart, placing gentle kisses on the the sensitive skin there before pulling your underwear down. Meanwhile, Whiskey continued his assault of kisses on your neck from behind you as he unlatched your bra and slid it off of your arms, tossing it somewhere in the room without a care as his large hands reached around to cup your breasts, his thick fingers trailing over your nipples until they fully hardened.  
  
You were already quivering from anticipation and the delicious, delicate scrape of their facial hair against your sensitive skin. Javier was still kissing between your thighs, slowly working his way up closer to your pussy as Whiskey sucked a hickey onto your neck and and toyed with your nipples, causing you to gasp and lean back against him. It was the only invitation Javier needed to finally taste you, moaning into it as soon as he did. There was something about being so exposed like this, already completely naked and at the mercy of two men still completely dressed. Javier licked into you deeply, exploring every inch of you his tongue could reach as little noises escaped him, completely losing himself in you as he trailed a hand up your thighs slowly and slipped two fingers inside you as he redirected his tongue's attention to your clit, applying just the right amount of pressure to have you quivering as he slowly pumped his fingers in and out of you a few times as he found his rhythm.  
  
"Atta girl." Whiskey whispered in your ear gruffly as your thighs begin to shake and you moaned. "We're just getting started and you're already handling us so nicely. Javier is going to make you come and then I'm using this here lasso to tie you to that bed of yours and you'll be all ours."  
  
"F-fuck." You groaned as Javier's tongue and fingers picked up speed, only slowing again to curl his fingers inside you and apply pressure to you g-spot. Whiskey slid one of his hands down to your hip to help you keep your balance.  
  
Javier pulled back and licked his lip, but continued to use his thumb to massage your clit as he continued to stroke your g-spot. "Fuck, you're perfect." He mumbled, planting a soft kiss to your stomach. "Come for me. I want to feel it." It shouldn't be that easy, it never was, but just like that you were coming with a moan, Whiskey holding you up as Javier grinned and worked you through it, biting his bottom lip as he felt you tighten around his fingers. "That's right, baby, that's fucking right. Good girl." He continue to pump in and out of you until you finally stopped shaking. He stood up, slowly kissing his way up your body to your lips before kissing you deeply, allowing you to taste yourself on his tongue and lips. "Fuck, you look so pretty when you come." He muttered when he pulled back, reaching for his jacket and sliding it off before starting on the buttons of his shirt to unbutton them as you heard the _clink_ of Whiskey's belt buckle unbuckling behind you.  
  
"I wasn't kiddin' about that lasso, sugar." He said into your ear as Javier started to undo his jeans and let them fall to the floor. He hadn't bothered wearing any underwear, and he kicked his boots and socks off unceremoniously. Whiskey spun you around, already fully undressed at this point, and pulled you for a quick kiss before saying. "On the bed. Hands up." before moving out of the way and grabbing one of two lassos that were attached to his belt on the floor. Javier smacked your ass as you made your way over to the bed, lying on your back and raising your arms to be tied up. Javier climbed up on the bed and between your legs, taking one of your nipples in his mouth and sucking and nibbling on it as Whiskey began to tie your hands with his lasso. "Don't worry, darlin'. This isn't one of the electric lassos you've heard about, this is just rope. But it's gonna keep you tied up good and tight for us while Javier here fucks you, and you swallow me down in that pretty little mouth of yours. Okay?"  
  
You nod frantically, as Javier pushes your legs further apart, raising one and hooking the ankle over his shoulder. "You ready?" He says with a smirk, taking his hand free of your ankle and wrapping it around his cock, stroking it a few times before rubbing the head against your lips.  
  
"Yes." You beg. "Please." It made Javier grin as Whiskey chuckles, checking your restraints and making sure they're secure to the bedframe but not too tight. Javier slowly eases himself inside of you, a noise of pleasure falling from his lips as he bottoms out, stretching you open. He began to thrust inside of you, setting up a steady rhythm that has the headboard smacking the wall with a thud with every motion of his hips. You can't stop the moans spilling from your mouth until Whiskey throws one of his legs over you, straddling your body and inching forward on his knees until his dick is just out of reach from your mouth.  
  
"Open up." He demands and you obey, sticking out you tongue as you do so just to tease him. He takes advantage of it to run the head of his cock along your tongue before shoving it all in your mouth in one thrust, his palm against the wall above the headboard for balance as his eyebrows tent and his closes his eyes in pleasure. Meanwhile, Javier is still fucking into you roughly, causing the entire bed to shake as his grunts fill your ears.  
  
"You take it so good, baby." He breathes, causing you to moan around Whiskey's dick.  
  
"Yes. She. Does." Whiskey grits, starting up his own pace, judging how far he can push you without choking before he begins matching Javier's pace, fucking your face with enough fervor to cause your jaw to deliciously ache.  
  
Overwhelmed and overstimulated, you moan, feeling so full and used in the best way possible, barely able to keep yourself from losing it in between both their thrusting inside of you as your wrists pull at the rope and your body shakes, so close to falling over the edge. "You gonna come on Javi's cock?" Whiskey teases, grinning down at you and wiping overstimulated tears from your eyes as he continues to thrust in your mouth. "That's our girl. You can come. We'll let you this time."  
  
One last moan builds in your throat as you climax for the second time, your body quivering as your back arches up off the bed. Javier only begins to pound you harder, a gruff "Fuck!" coming from him as his own orgasm begins to build. "I'm going to fill you up." He promises. "You're going to look so good with my come leaking out of you." He comes through with his promise as his hips begin to stutter, grabbing you by the hips and thrusting into you one last time as he spills inside of you with a moan. Before he's done coming, Whiskey is coming into your mouth with a moan of his own and you swallow it down, slight whimpers coming from the back of your sore, wrecked throat. Whiskey pulls out of your mouth and begins to untie you, rubbing your wrists gently to make sure they're okay as you catch your breathe. Javier slowly ease of you, watching his cock slide out from deep inside you with admiration. They both flop on the remaining space of the bed, their chests rising and falling quickly as they come down from their post orgasm highs. Javier leans close to you, planting a tender kiss on your forehead. "You alright?' He asks, his voice hoarse.  
  
You smile, barely able to keep your eyes open. Your body feels weightless and sore, and you couldn't be happier. "I'm better than alright. We should do that again sometime."


End file.
